Every indexed document

and say that it's okay for BDSM-identified people to practice BDSM

we are often casting BDSM sexuality as something that we would

rather than trying to change the rule. We are calling BDSM a ""fault

we are accepting and validating the way our culture tries to shame

so please have pity on me!"" In other words

there's no reason people shouldn't be able to do what they want

because it's not built-in; it's just something they do sometimes

it doesn't go to their core. They can change from being into BDSM to

who don't feel it the same way I do. They don't

'my relationships which were vanilla were not fulfilling.

and they almost always report that 'This has been the way I was all along. I

as he very eloquently describes how BDSM can be considered a sexual

or instantly recognize BDSM once we find it. Here's a

now the idea of a ""BDSM orientation"" seems kinda boring. I am

come to terms with... even embrace. It was a hugely liberating way

like my bone structure or eye color. BDSM became something that it was

and applying the word ""orientation"" to BDSM

it also felt right. When I looked back at my memories and previous

as weird as the concept of ""BDSM as an orientation"" felt when I

and everyone else can kick me out of their