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C Ve. higher * Spare peop ple physical. @ bodys du eatin als: 4 i lle-aged ie feelings Chapter 4° Health by Connection: From Social Brains to Resilient Bodies We enter and leave the world alone, but at no time do we exist disconnected from others. The connection with the mother that begins ‘ The lead author is Louise C. Hawkley, Ph.D., a Senior Research Scientist (Assistant Professor), member of the Center for Cognitive and Social Neuroscience, and Associate Director of the Social Neuroscience Laboratory at the University of Chicago. Her research is concerned with the interplay of psychological and physiological factors, and includes the study of autonomic, neuroendocrine, immune, genetic, and behavioral processes that contribute to physical and mental health and well-being in individuals differing in perceived social connectedness. She has published numerous articles and chapters on perceived social isolation (loneliness) and its antecedents and consequences in young and aging adults. Hawkley finds awe in the significance of what it means to be a social species. Atul Gawande wrote, “We are social not just in the trivial sense that we like company, and not just in the obvious sense that we each depend on others. We are social in a more elemental way: simply to exist as a normal human being requires interaction with other people” (The New Yorker, March 2009). Hawkley believes that we are social beings to our cellular core, and even that does not capture the full extent of our sociality. For these reasons, she is increasingly uncomfortable with the term “loneliness,” a term that is laden with popular definitions and understandings that only hint at the deeper significance of our social nature. As she shows, what the study of loneliness actually reveals is that feeling wanted and accepted and like one belongs are as vital to our existence as the air we breathe. Nothing kills like being denied a socially meaningful existence. adults Page |4l in utero does not end with the physical severing of the umbilical cord but continues in a lengthy dependence on the mother or primary caregiver(s) for food and safety. Years are needed for the infant to reach physical and reproductive maturation, but as Cacioppo notes, even more importantly these years are needed for the infant to develop the social and emotional skills necessary for survival in a complex social world. We graduate from infantile dependence not to independence but to interdependence (cooperation, trust, reciprocity, etc.). That we are born to and for connection explains why feeling disconnected, isolated, and like we don’t belong can be so painful. We call these feelings loneliness. Feelings of loneliness function like physical pain or hunger or thirst; they motivate us to alleviate the social pain and to repair our sense of connectedness. This is an important adaptive function of loneliness because people who feel connected fare much better than those who feel disconnected. They are not only happier but also healthier than their more lonely counterparts. As we will see, the power of felt connectedness reverberates throughout the human body. As was aptly stated by Frederick Buechner, “You can kiss your family and friends good-bye and put miles between you, but at the same time you carry them with you in your heart, your mind, your stomach, because you do not just live in a world but a world lives in you.”’ We tend to take for granted our sense of social connectedness, but that should not blind us to its powerful, albeit invisible, influence on our lives. Its impact is best exposed when we observe the effects of its absence (i.e., loneliness) on physical and mental health and well-being. Loneliness is a Health Risk, but How? HOUSE_OVERSIGHT_021287