about cunnilingus being "not manly.”

about cunnilingus being "not manly.” Here's my wrap-up: sympathy is good. Trying to build a better relationship is good. And I understand that some people may have serious, important reasons that they can't or don't want to walk away from their romantic partner. (That's one of the things feminism has always worked towards: giving people many sources of support and safety nets, so people can leave abusive partners if necessary.) But. Seriously, if your partner sucks? Walking away is an option -- it's even an option, sometimes, when you think it's not an option. Just remember that. te Kk ok This post can be found on the Internet at: http://clarissethorn.com/blog/2011/10/31/a-unified-theory-of-orgasm/ BOUNDARIES: [storytime] I'm Not Your Sex-Crazy Nympho Dreamgirl This was originally published in 2011 on GoodMenProject.com, and it got a lot of attention. I think the feelings I outline in this piece are shared by a lot of people, and that they're one of the reasons people often get angry about porn. But as I said in "BDSM Can Be 'Love Sex' Too," I don't think restricting porn is the answer to these feelings. I think the answer is encouraging people to be honest, yet respectful and flexible about their desires. For many people, mainstream porn seems to function as sex education -- and that can be a real problem, because mainstream porn shows a very specific stereotype of sexuality. But if more people had better and more complete sex education, then more people would recognize that mainstream porn is a very limited and particular product, and they'd also recognize that most people aren't interested in actually enacting that style of sexuality. I also think porn probably receives an unfair portion of the blame in these debates. It's possible that the current ubiquity of porn is partly to blame for "sex- crazy nympho dreamgirl" anxieties, but there are plenty of other stereotype sources in our culture -- I wish that all the people who talk about banning porn would also talk about banning romantic comedies! te Kk ok I'm Not Your Sex-Crazy Nympho Dreamgirl There's this cultural image of what it means to be female, and good in bed. The image includes being young and thin and cisgendered of course, and that can be problematic. But it also includes a lot of behavioral stuff: the way you squirm, the way you moan, being Super Excited about everything the guy wants to do, and Always Being Up for It -- whatever "It" is. When people think about "good in bed," for a woman, that's often what they think. HOUSE_OVERSIGHT_018511